story of my life

Proof of Life

Hi, everybody!  I have an announcement to make!  I am still alive.  I know it got kinda sketchy there, since it’s been who knows when since I posted last, but hey… I’ve been super busy.  I am coming up for a breather; today was my last day on this current contract, and I have a blissful two whole weeks off work until I return to the grind.  Woo!!

So, let me update you briefly on what has been going on in my life!

Storm had another UTI that led to a blockage.  We had to rush him to the vet on Saturday morning.  He was cath’d and returned to us with a plethora of prescriptions.  After urinalysis and some blood testing, our vet determined that Storm was not forming crystals.  Instead, he was forming mucus plugs, most likely caused by stress… by his fighting with Q, who had been stirring shit up lately.  So we had some meds to help relax his urethra so he could pee, some antibiotics, and… get this… some antidepressants.

Yes, my perpetually happy and playful cat is on some antidepressants now.  They’re supposed to stabilize his mood/help with his Q-generated anxiety, and keep him regular.  Our vet plans to wean him off of them eventually, and we are considering putting Q on them instead since she seems to have the most trouble with coexisting with all the other cats.  Storm has been doing fine since the blockage in mid-May, so we’re hopeful we’ve got this recurrent problem figured out.

I celebrated my 31st birthday!  My parents gifted me with an awesome stereo for my car.  It’s got bluetooth integration and I can use it for hands-free calling.  I loaded my mp3 collection onto a jump drive and play my tunes straight from that.  I love it!!  Meemaw hooked me up with the above-pictured tool set.  I was really wanting a reciprocating and circular saw, and these Ryobi tools are sized perfectly for my little hands.  We went out with my parents/grandparents/Llek to Casa Blanca for Mexican and margaritas on the actual night of my birthday, and then had a big family celebration the following weekend that tied together mine and my cousin Nick’s birthdays.

Canadian Bacon and I are still keto.  He’s lost more than twice the weight I have and it frustrates me to no end.  I have been losing/gaining the same 5lbs since February, although my body is still definitely reshaping.  I am steadily losing inches and I lost my pants in the middle of the street dashing after Rudy the other day (THAT’S a long story…).  But still, it’s really frustrating to not see the scale budging.

We’ve gone off-plan this week, mostly due to stress, and to me hoping to “shock” my body back into losing.  On Monday, we will be flying to Canada for a week to visit his parents, and we don’t want to have to worry about staying on-plan then.  It’s my fervent hope that all the exercise I’ll get there + the temporary change in diet will = a scale victory when we return home.

Our keto meals have been very simple and easy, and have consisted of a lot of stuff like Philly Cheesesteakadillas (Steak-Ums with mozz grilled in low-carb tortillas), Cheesey Bacon Dogs (pictured above, with an in-depth post coming soon), basic wraps, oven-baked bacon cheeseburgers, and random cuts of meat cooked in the crockpot all day with steamer bags of broccoli.  Not gonna lie, we’ve also eaten more than our fair share of Burritos.  That’s a local mom-and-pop Mexican restaurant that’s similar to Chipotle, except cheaper and better.  We get a “plate” which is pretty much a “burrito bowl,” all the toppings smothered in cheese and sour cream and super low carb.  Sooooo good.

More recipes are coming soon.  I have three shot, and I need to edit the photos and write the posts.  Sorry it’s been so long!

One day a couple of weeks ago, I was driving to work and I got stuck at a really bad place in traffic on the interstate.  I was in a stretch about 7 miles long between exits, and there was a wreck that had the road completely shut down.  After sitting there for over an hour, I finally gave up and called into work because the wait had given me such a headache.  I was able to drive down the median to the next exit and turn myself around.  Futher down the road, I saw a car literally lodged in a tree.  Rescue workers were taking chainsaws to the tree to get it down!

I went back to bed and woke up feeling much better.  I was determined to not waste the day, so CB and I decided to go on an adventure.  It was hot and lovely and I wanted to go swimming, and public pools suck.  So I pulled up a map of Land Between the Lakes and found a beach that looked promising.  We packed some wraps, our bathing suits and sunscreen, and headed out.

It was absolutely beautiful there.  Only a few families were out and about, since it was early afternoon on a Tuesday.  We swam back and forth down the shoreline, laid out on the rocks and looked for shells, and otherwise just enjoyed ourselves.

We are going to go back in August, when a bunch of my college friends are going to get together there for a cookout and fun times.  Can’t wait to hang out with everyone again!!

Last Sunday, CB and I ran the Color Me Rad 5k in Nashville.  It was a miserable experience.

I have been doing the C25K training program for 7 weeks now.  The program finishes in 9.  I am still not running a 5k.  I can run for 25 minutes without stopping, but uh, let’s face it, I’m barely faster than Internet Explorer.  My actual 5k run time would be more like 45-50 minutes.  Maybe even an hour.  Dude, I’m slow.

The day dawned too early and too hot.  It was in the mid-90s by our race time of 9am.  I am taking antibiotics for a nasty boil on my leg (and you know that makes running fuuuuun).  The course was not just on pavement – it was also on loose gravel and wet grass.  It sucked.  I walked 75% of the race and felt like a failure.  In retrospect, there were a lot of factors against me, and I’m going to try another one.  But this one will be in the fall, when it’s cooler, and after I’ve successfully completed the C25K program.

At least I looked awesomely colorful.

Here’s an adorable kitten to take away from the shittiness of my next update.

Shortly after I came home from work on Monday, Meemaw’s 4-year old pitbull mix, Cookie, mauled her 10-year old collie mix, Chewy.

Rudy started barking the instant I came home, and about 15 minutes later, as Darren and I sat there talking, we became concerned by the continued yapping.  Finally I said “I’d better check on that” and threw on my shoes and went outside.  I realized the noise was coming from the sunroom, and it wasn’t until halfway up the stairs that I was finally able to hear Meemaw’s panicked “HELP ME SOMEONE” screams.

Cookie was latched onto Chewy’s throat and there was blood everywhere.  This makes the 5th time that she’s attacked her.  The first time, CB wound up in the hospital for stitches.  We’ve told Meemaw time and time again that Cookie is a killer who just snaps, but she doesn’t believe us.  In the heat of the moment, she certainly seemed to – I can still hear Meemaw screaming desperately “She’s killing her!” as I rushed to try to separate them.

I had to kick Rudy off of them several times – he was right in the middle, snapping and being a nuisance.

I kicked Cookie hard in the ribs, but knew from experience that wouldn’t do anything.

In sheer panic, I grabbed her by the collar and lifted her front end off the ground.  I held her for more than a minute until she finally started to go groggy from lack of oxygen.  When I could rip her off Chewy, I did, and dragged her – still fighting – out the sunroom door.  Chewy had collapsed.  I screamed for CB, grabbed my phone, and called the emergency vet.  Our vet didn’t answer.  I called Banfield at CB’s suggestion, since they were still open, and they refused to take us.  They gave me a number to another clinic.  CB had to wrap Chewy in a towel, and as I was on the phone trying to call the other vet and yelling at Meemaw and holding the door open for him, that little fucker Rudy bolted out the door.  Meemaw flipped her shit.

I chased Rudy next door, into the neighbor’s yard, and shut him in.  Then I was back to the car and back on the phone with our actual vet, who had called me back and immediately asked if Storm was okay (I love her!).  We met her down at the clinic, and spent the next 3 hours assisting as she pieced Chewy back together.

It was simultaneously a surreal, fascinating, and terrifying experience.  CB had to carry Chewy to the table in surgery and move her several times for the vet.  We took turns holding the gas mask on her face.  We compressed where the vet told us to and let go when she told us to and held skin together when she told us to.  The deck floor and Sugarbandit’s back seat looked like a murder had taken place.

The vet said there was no doubt in her mind that Cookie was trying to kill Chewy – she was trying to rip her throat out, and that’s where the worst wounds were.  She recommended against ever putting another dog with Cookie.

This did not sink into Meemaw very well.  It seemed like at first she thought we were being ridiculous in rushing Chewy to the e-vet.  She wanted us to leave her there and capture Rudy first.  Then she kept wanting to know what was taking us so long there.  And then the next morning, when we woke up and were flushing out Chewy’s wounds with an antibiotic solution (we have to do that twice daily, subcutaneously, as well as give her a plethora of oral medication), she was at the door to the sunroom cooing to Cookie about how Cookie just wants to see how Chewy is doing and about how much she loves her.

I think it finally clicked in her head that Cookie will kill Chewy.  Now she plans to fence in the front yard for one of the dogs, and have a new driveway poured, and a bunch of other bullshit.  I am of the opinion that Cookie needs to be gotten rid of – preferrably to an animal-free home – but I am aware that she is an adult pit who has attacked another dog on multiple occasions and wounded a human, so I know that’s not likely.  I am actually finding myself, for the first time in my life, leaning towards the side of “some animals need to be put down for aggression.”  This was a very traumatic experience and I’m hoping my vacation time helps me get over it, because I tend to dwell on it on my drives to-and-from work.

I really don’t like Cookie and don’t want anything to do with her anymore.

Here’s another adorable cat picture, because that last bit was so depressing.

On Monday, CB and I are hopping a flight for Saulte St. Marie, MI, where his parents will collect us and drive us across the border.  I am SO looking forward to our trip to Canada!!  It’s going to be an awesome opportunity to relax and decompress, and when we return, I’m still going to have another week off work!

I WILL BE ABLE TO SLEEP.  I don’t even know what sleep is anymore, guys.  I suspect that lack of sleep is a large part of my continued inability to lose weight.  Speaking of sleep, I can go to bed right now and not have to wake up to an alarm clock in the morning!!

Good night!!

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  1. Gah, the Cookie thing is so hard. I watched a friend’s marriage dissolve over a similar situation. The husband came to the opinion that they had exhausted every avenue possible to rehab the dog and the wife kept believing that something would finally work. Two years after the divorce, she finally had the dog put down. It’s hard when everyone can’t come to an agreement about what needs to be done.

    I have a dog with a high prey drive and use a correction collar. Normally I’m anti shocking dogs but I was at my wits end. I couldn’t get through to the dog once she was focused. I did all the positive treat training for the good noise and used the bad noise/ mildest vibration shock possible to break the prey spell. She’s been zapped less than 10 times. It doesn’t hurt. She doesn’t yelp. She just tries to figure out what the hell is happening. It’s so mild that she just sniffs her own ass trying to figure where it’s coming from. All I have to do is make the bad noise and she immediately returns to me. Lastly, if she ever needs to really stop something, like attacking, I can assuredly say that as long as I have the remote, I can turn the knob and she will stop what she’s doing, Even if Meemaw didn’t positive train Cookie. She’s be able to shock Cookie off another animal.

    1. Enid,

      Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting, especially on a personal post like this one. I don’t get many comments on these and it always brightens my day to read one :) You are right, the Cookie issue is really difficult. I essentially have no say in the matter, since she’s not my dog. What Meemaw wound up doing was having a fence installed in her front yard. Cookie now lives in the back yard, and Chewy, Rudy, and Gizmo are allowed outside in the front yard during the day. Chewy has pretty much transitioned to being an indoor dog, which is great (I detest the idea of outdoor dogs, but Meemaw is from the old school where big dog = outdoor dog).

      However, all the problems weren’t solved by putting up the new fence. The other day, I was in the kitchen when Meemaw started screaming for help from the sunroom. She’d opened the door to give Cookie a treat, and Cookie immediately lunged to get past her and get into the house. I managed to get Chewy shut away from her before there was contact, and dragged her back outside. Afterwards, I had a serious discussion with my grandfather about the merits of a shock collar. I’d tried last summer to talk Meemaw into one, but she refused. After that incident, we overruled her and I ordered one from Amazon. It hasn’t arrived yet, but I am hoping it will help with her behavior issues (in addition to her going for other animals, she also barks loudly ALL DAY LONG – we are going to try to rectify that off the bat). Like you said, at the very least, I am hoping I can shock her off of anything else she tries to destroy.

      I’m sure I will post more about all of that later on. Again, I wanted to thank you for commenting on the situation. I really appreciate your advice!

I love comments, and read every last one. Talk to me!